The flood of news coverage about the suicide of Phoebe Prince has set me to thinking about what makes kids into bullies.
My children attend JCDS, Boston’s Jewish Community Day School. Students at all academic levels are admitted to the school. JCDS is less concerned about intellect than about whether the student, and his or her parents, are compatible with the school’s culture.
In the 6½ years I’ve had children at JCDS, only a few families have chosen to leave. Some of those departures were due to academic needs the school could not fulfill, but others were because their kids simply didn’t fit in.
I’m sure many of you just cringed. We all know what “didn’t fit in” means, right? Kids that are brainy, nerdy, funny-looking, or too fat. Kids who do their homework and care about getting good grades. Kids who would rather play D&D than football. Right?
Nope. At JCDS, fitting in isn’t about any of those things. Rather, it’s almost entirely about one thing and one thing only: treating others with respect. Kids with an “attitude” just don’t fit in at JCDS. What’s most interesting is that usually, their parents don’t either. (more…)
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