Eleven days ago, I bounced a check.
Ten days ago, I bounced another check.
I didn’t even realize I’d done it until today, when I finally got around to plowing through the mound of paperwork I’d been allowing to accumulate for weeks in my inbox.
I. Do. Not. Bounce. Checks.
The guy who is so careless with his finances that he can bounce checks is not me. The $59 moron tax I paid to the bank for bouncing the checks isn’t even the point. The point is that, as warped and pitiful as it might seem, keeping control over all the important little things in my life, things like regular finances, is part of who I am.
It’s bad enough that I’ve been so overwhelmed this summer that the yard sale I promised to organize for my wife and the kids hasn’t happened yet and may not happen at all. It’s bad enough that our gardens and yard have turned into overgrown patches of weeds, because I couldn’t find the time to make a few phone calls to find a landscaper to come clean them up. No, I had to get so behind in the finances that I bounced two checks. It’s extraordinarily demoralizing.
It’s clear that I have allowed Jews for Obama to take over too much of my life. With school starting for the kids next week, and with the High Holidays rapidly approaching, things are only going to get busier, and yet the campaign is going to get much busier at the same time.
Clearly, I need to find a way to spend less time on J4O. But I feel I am doing the things that I am best at to help a cause which is much larger than any other cause I have ever been involved in. To convince myself to spend less time on it, I’ll probably have to convince myself that what I’m doing doesn’t really make all that much of a difference. If I manage to convince myself, then I’ll be depressed about all the time I poured into something that “doesn’t really make all that much of a difference,” so it’s a no-win situation.